In a time like this when there is so many people are having hard times, I decided to write a little differently. I have the upmost respect for the Covid-19 situation and a great deal of empathy for those who have lost loved ones. This FICTIONAL story is nothing more than a play on words for a bit of dark humor and entertainment. I mean no disrespect to anyone. The characters and events in this story are FICTIONAL, and do not represent any real person or situation. THIS IS FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY.
Peable Furst sat thumbing through a 2020 issue of a magazine. She admired the doctors and nurses featured as the most beautiful people in the world. Dressed in her regular business attire she drank her coffee and prepared for her day of customer service calls.
The clock chimed nine times and she hurried upstairs to her home office. She logged onto her computer and went about her work. Two hours went by and she decided to take a quick break. She headed down to the kitchen to get another cup of coffee, when she heard a knock on the front door. Pausing for a second, she just stared at the front door. The knocking stopped and the doorbell rang but she did not move. She took another sip of her coffee and started towards the door. The bell rang violently, and she rushed to see who it was. She opened the door to a couple of gentlemen dressed in suits.
"Can I help you?" she asked.
The first gentleman pushed back his jacket revealing a police badge.
"Hello, mam. I am detective Ray Binslay and this is Detective Sandy Gomo. We are investigating a missing person’s report and we would like to ask you a few questions. Do you have a moment?"
Peable had not seen or spoke to anyone in quite some time. She was elated to have someone at her door. She moved to the side to allow the men in.
"Absolutely. I would be happy to help," she said.
Ray was a tall man who towered over Sandy. The men entered the house and Peable showed them to the living room.
"Could I get either of you a cup of coffee?" Peable asked.
Sandy Quickly replied, "No thank you mam. We would just like to ask you a few questions about your neighbor.
Sandy's down to business attitude made Peable back off of her happy go lucky attitude a bit as she sat down in her favorite rocker.
"Well, what would you like to know?" she asked.
"First off, we have tried several times to speak to you, but we've had no luck getting you to answer. We've spoken to all your neighbors who said they weren't sure if you were home and they hadn't seen you in some time. Have you been away?" officer Sandy asked.
"Oh no," Peables said chuckling, "I have been working from home ever since the stay at home order was issued a few months ago."
Both detective Ray and Sandy looked at each other with a puzzled look on their face.
"Do you mean the stay at home order that was given during the Covid-19 pandemic?" Asked Sandy.
Peables laughed and took a sip of her coffee.
"Well of course silly. What else would I be talking about." she responded
"You said a few months ago?" asked Ray.
"That's what I said." she responded. What's this all about? Peable asked clearly annoyed.
Detective Sandy stood up and started looking around the house, making Peable very nervous. He looked down the hallway and peaked into the kitchen. Ray sat on the couch writing in his pocket book.
"Ms. Furst, we would like to ask you a few questions about your neighbor Ronald Rump." said detective Ray.
"You already said that. So, what do you want to know." Peables snapped.
"When was the last time you saw Mr. Rump?" Asked Sandy, still looking around the house.
Peables stood up and walked to the stairs grabbing a picture from Sandy's hand and placing it back on the bookshelf.
"I see that obnoxious fool every day at 3 p.m. like clockwork. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go upstairs and clock out of my computer, since this is obviously going to take more than a minute."
Peable, headed up the stairs to her office. Both detectives followed hot on her heals. When they walked in, they noticed that her desk sat looking out the back window directly into Mr. Rumps backyard. There were no curtains or blinds on the window, and it was wide open. Peables logged out of her computer while both detectives curiously looked around the office.
"Okay, now what exactly can I do for you gentlemen. This is costing me time and money."
"You said that you see Mr. Rump every day at 3 p.m.?"
"Yes, glad to see your both paying attention."
"Ms. Furst. We are investigating a missing person report that was filed nearly a year ago on November 4th, 2020." said detective Sandy.
Peable began laughing so hard she sprayed her coffee all over the two gentlemen.
"What is this? Some kind of prank from my co-workers?" she asked.
"Mam, I don't think this is a laughing matter." said Ray.
Peables stopped laughing as she noticed Sandy rummaging through the paperwork on her desk.
"Hey, what the hell do you think you're doing?" she said as she rushed over and snatched her files from him."
Detective Ray stepped in front of Peables Furst and asked her one question.
"Peable, What year do you think it is?"
"Okay, this is getting weird now. I think you both need to leave," she answered.
She stepped around both of them and made her way toward the stairs to let them out.
Sandy ran quickly up behind her and grabbed her by the arm.
"Mam, we just need you to answer the question, please."
"I don't know what is going on but if it will make you leave, It is May of 2020. There you happy? Now leave!" she said, pointing down the stairs.
Sandy took a firm grip on her arm while detective Ray moved closer getting out his handcuffs. Peable tried pulling away but she was no match for the two men.
"Mam, were going to need you to answer a few more questions down at the station." said Ray.
Down at the police station Peable sat by herself waiting for the detectives to return with a cup of coffee she had requested.
"Sorry for the wait," said detective Ray. We needed to make a few phone calls. We called you an attorney and, we have to let you know that you have the right to remain silent."
"I don't know what you are talking about," replied Peable, "I have done nothing wrong and do not need an attorney." She spat back at the detectives.
"Well as we said before we are investigating the disappearance of Ronald Rump, your next -door neighbor who went missing last year on November 4th, 2020," said Ray.
"We think you might be able to shed some light on it for us," said Sandy.
"Well I got nothing to hide so let's get to it," said Peable.
"Okay, first could you take us back to the day you found out about the Covid-19 stay at home order," said detective Ray.
Peable took a sip of her coffee and sat back in her chair.
"Well, as I told you before, two months ago I started working at home, like we all were ordered to. I set up my office in my daughters old room upstairs because it had the best light in the house. You know she's missing too, right. She has been missing since she turned eighteen. You should probably look into that instead of that loudmouth neighbor of mine."
Both detectives took notes as she spoke.
"At first it was nice to be out of the office. My house is quiet and that was a welcome change from sitting in a warehouse full of cubicles and phones ringing constantly. I worked for about a week when all of a sudden that obnoxious fool began working at home too. I couldn't help but to keep my window open because there is no circulation in that part of the house, and it gets way to stuffy up there."
Detective Ray pulled out a newspaper from his paperwork. He sat the paper in front of Peable.
"Can you read the date on that paper to me."
Peable picked up the newspaper and without flinching read, "November 5th, 2021."
She slid it back to Ray and took a sip of her coffee. Both detectives began writing in their notebooks again.
"Detective Sandy, would you please go try making that phone call again. I think we are going to need that information," Ray said.
Detective Sandy got up from the table and left the room.
"Sorry, go ahead," said detective Ray.
"Sure, as shit Ronald started having these really long conference calls with some guy named DR. Fruity. That poor guy must have really needed his job because he took a lot of abuse from that boss of his."
"Are sure his name was DR. Fruity?" asked the detective.
"I'm positive. That inconsiderate, self-centered man made damn sure to sit right next to the fence. He couldn't use the other acre of yard. No, he had to sit so close that my customers could hear him boast about being God or something."
Detective Ray rummaged through his paper work looking for something.
"Did you ever see the man at the house with Ronald?"
"Yeah, every day," she said. I told you they were on conference calls every day at 3.pm."
"I know but did you ever see him in person?"
"No. I don't think anyone could tolerate that man in person, except that gold-digging wife of his. Between the combover hair and the fake tan, I don't see how she could stand to look at him," she said making a puking noise.
"Could you describe the Doctor?"
"Yeah, he was a squirrely little doctor that must have had some sort of glutton for punishment. You know that man would sit there and let Mr. Rump put him down, disagree with him and then call him names, every day. I just don't get why people put up with that shit," Peable Fust said.
The detective took out a photograph of a gray- haired man in a doctors coat and set it on the table just as detective Sandy returned. Detective Gomo whispered into Rays ear before sitting down.
"Yup that's him. He looks much happier in that photo than I remember," said Ms. Furst.
Ray continued taking notes.
"Okay, so you say that you have seen Mr. Rump every day since the stay at home order took place, right?"
"That's what I said."
"So, you saw him last night?"
Peables paused. She looked down in her coffee cup for several minutes. The smile on her face was replaced by a look of confusion. She grabbed the newspaper once again and began to read it. Both detectives sat in silence watching her. She looked up from the paper about ten minutes later.
"So, your telling me that this is real?" she asked.
"Yes, mam," answered detective Ray. "The stay at home order only lasted a couple of months. It ended over a year ago."
Peable stood up and walked to the window.
"Are you telling us that you have been in your house for over a year without leaving?" asked detective Sandy.
"Well, it's not like you can't get everything you need delivered to the door," spit back Peable.
She walked back to the table and sat down. She sat down and put her head on her hands and began to cry.
"There's something I don't understand," said Ray. "You said that your daughter is missing and has been gone since she turned eighteen. Did you ever report it?"
Peable whipped her head up and screamed back, "What are you talking about. My daughter is not missing."
Both detectives flinched and began frantically writing in their notebooks.
"What happened to my daughter. You know something and you're not telling me. It was that bastard Ronald Rump, wasn't it.? I freaking new he was bad news."
"No, no. Nothing has happened to your daughter. Calm down, please. Can we get you some more coffee?" asked detective Sandy.
Peable Furst smiled and sat back in her chair.
"No, I would like a cigarette though. I don't smoke much but, now and then, I like to light up. My daughter doesn't know though so don't tell her."
Detective Gomo stood up.
"I could use one too. I will go get us a smoke and an ashtray. Are you sure I can't get you anything to eat or drink while I'm out?"
"Well now that you mention it, I am getting a little hungry. Why don't you grab me a burger or something."
"Alrighty than a burger and a smoke. I'll be back in a few."
"Hold on a minute," said detective Ray, "I'll join you."
Detective Binslay returned about a half hour later with a hamburger, and cigarettes.
"It's about freaking time." Peable exclaimed, "You have been gone for hours."
When they were done eating detective Sandy joined them once again.
"Ms. Furst can you tell us more about Ronald Rump. What was your interactions with him ?"
"Oh, I can tell you about Mr. Rump alright." Peable exclaimed. "I tried to be civil, but after nearly a week of listening to My Rumps squeaky voice screaming at people, I decided to break the rules and go ask if he would please have his meetings inside or at a later time. I knocked on the door and he answered wearing his superman underwear and a blue suit jacket. I remember thinking how pompous he had to be to think it was okay to answer the door this way," she continued.
Ms. Peable lit another cigarette and began to fidget with the lighter.
"I explained my situation and tried to bargain some sort of compromise with him, but all that man could do was lie to me and say he had better reception outside. Then you know what he had the balls to tell me?"
Both detectives chimed simultaneously "No, what."
"He told me that my job wasn't important. He said that the world could live without me, but the world relied on people like him to take charge and make shit happen."
Peable's face became bright red as she put out one cigarette and lit another.
"What did you do then?" asked Sandy.
"I didn't do anything," said Peable, leaning back in her seat with a grin.
"When was the next time you had any interactions with Mr. Rump?" asked Ray.
"The next day when he set up his speakers outside. He had the gall to say that he had some sort of hearing issue and needed the speakers to do his work. What a crock of shit. Yeah you heard me. Instead of being a decent human being. He thought it would be fun to hook up his house speakers to blue tooth so that I would have no choice but to move. He thought he was so smart."
It had been nearly six hours since they had arrived at the station but the detectives where hanging on every word.
"Listen this is all good information, but could we get down to the last time you saw Ronald alive," barked detective Gomo.
"Hold on I'm getting there. I spent the next couple weeks doing everything I could to get him out of the backyard. I watered the flowers , I blasted my stereo, I mowed the yard. Nothing I did seemed to work. In fact, it took a whole new life. He began blasting me on twitter every day. He was mean and cruel, and I just couldn't handle it anymore."
Peable stood up and began to pace as she continued telling her story.
"Finally, I decided I should play nice instead. I made him a bowl of home -made chicken noodle soup with fresh alphabet shaped noodles. I hand delivered it in hopes that I would kill him with kindness. He invited me in ,and we went to the backyard. That's when I saw it."
"Saw what?" said Ray.
"I saw my daughters bike. Right there in the shed. I knew for sure that he was the one who took my daughter. I Knew he was a no- good lying sack of shit." she said.
Now both detectives where smoking and she sat back down. They took notes, writing down every word she spoke. She leaned in across the table and they met her in anticipation of her next words.
"Okay boys, this is where you become the hero. You are going to solve the mystery behind my daughters disappearance and Mr. Rumps disappearance," she whispered.
She sat back in her chair before continuing.
"When I saw my daughters bike, I confronted him. He lied of course and called me fake and all kinds of other awful names. He said I was a crazy bitch and that I needed to use the brains I had been given. Well, what was I supposed to do. It's not like he was going to just admit that he was a liar. You know I find it almost ironic that as I stood before him to make peace, he just continued to take care of himself and continued to eat the soup without so much as a thank you."
Peable jumped out of her chair and moved to the window. The detectives jumped at her quick movements. Peable began to laugh so hard that she nearly wet herself. Both Ray and Sandy sat deciding weather, they were more concerned, or just flat out curious as to what she would say next.
"What. What is so funny?" asked Sandy.
"What's so funny, you've got to be kidding right," she said.
"What happened!" yelled Ray.
"Well that's the best part of all. He sat there eating like a pig, indulging on my peace offering and when I lunged toward him, he began to choke. I didn't have to lay a finger on him. Of course, I could have helped but why would I. You see, he choked on his own words," she said, through tears and laughter.
Both detectives sat in shock as she began flailing her arms and laughing. A knock on the door interrupted the insane display from Peable. A women and man in their mid- thirties entered the room. Peable stopped laughing as she noticed the new additions to the party.
"Oh good, you're hear. I thought I was only getting one lawyer, but that's okay. I just told the detectives what happened, and they know that I didn't do anything wrong. Mr. Rump died of natural causes. I was just getting ready to tell them they can find his body in his flower garden right next to the sunflowers."
The young woman started to cry.
"Mom, it's me. You remember your family, right? Holly and Bo Binton. Mom I have been trying to e-mail you for a year, but something has gone terribly wrong with the e-mails I sent.